I apologise for falling straight off the face of the earth again, I really do. I’ve been very busy, and mostly with exciting things – though occasionally (including right now) I’ve simply been fighting off sickness in some form or other; right now it’s just a boring seasonal cold. I will do better, it’s my current vow/resolution/positive intention for the year ahead.

For now though, it’s been an awfully eventful few months, where on earth am I supposed to start?

@lucyhannahryan

Well, as I’d hinted at on various platforms… I had news I couldn’t share for a while. That news being that I won the City Of Stories competition 2018 for Kensington and Chelsea, with a story called In The Absence of Moonlight. I also had the pleasure of reading the story in a Chelsea Library. The competition was all about connecting with local libraries and making the most of what a wonderful resource they are, so getting to stand in the same place I took the writing class in, with friends there to bear witness was truly lovely.

After a string of rejections, I wrote a piece called Medea and Cassandra, in Embrace for a literary zine called Strange Creatures, all about the weird and monstrous, which I’ve very pleased with. There’s nothing quite like, after a seemingly relentless streak of rejection and inferiority, being told ‘This is beautiful, I want to share it with the world.’ Really, there is no greater compliment or pick me up, and I’m very fond of the poem. I’m also always pleased to slip something sapphic through the net, since it’s a part of me I am so protective and in awe of, being able to talk about girls, dangerous, gorgeous frightening, girls in all their facets will always feel radical to me.

In October, my cousin got married, which meant my family and I got to take a brief sabbatical up north to the lakes and spend a few days with nature, which I always adore. I particularly loved the long hikes in the woods, despite being horribly under the weather at the time. I wrote in my diary an elegie for the singularly romantic experience of a woodland on a sunny autumn day, enclosed into the heart of the forest, watching the leaves tumble away, ruby and gold.

@lucyhannahryan

As I truly got under way with my university degree (including sending off my first assignment, and getting a good grade!), I had to make the sad step of say goodbye to my Poetry Cafe family. I cannot be more grateful for my time spent there. The experience it offered me was invaluable, but more than anything I am glad of the wonderful people it introduced me to. Some of the kindest, most generous and magical souls have passed through those walls, and I am glad to have had the opportunity to stand beside them, for a little while. As a parting gift they bought me these lovely roses and a sodalite crystal, chosen for it’s connection to scholars and students, as well as the lovely goodbye card which will be a mainstay of my pinboard for a long time. Of course, I am still able to do a job I absolutely adore, working in mental health, with people who have suffered in countless ways but feel safe enough to say so to me since – I have too. It is a life-changing position and one I am frankly honoured to hold. I hope I am making as much of an impact on people’s lives as they are making on mine.

In November, I got to experience the truly holy experience of seeing Florence and the Machine live in concert, in which I held hands with, cried with, and hugged strangers and belted out songs nowhere close to my vocal range without a care. I am already aching to feel that transcendence again.

As you might be aware, the cultural landmark that was Rookie Mag has closed it’s doors. I found myself more affected than I expected. Of course, I only contributed one thing, (conveniently mentioned in my previous post on here, which really does show you how long it’s been), I still felt very affected by this news. I completely understand and respect Tavi’s decision to let it go gently into that good night, but I am still somewhat saddened that future creative forces will not have that voice whispering, darling, it’s alright.

@wythings

Finally, on Monday night, my writing group, Write Young Things hosted a poetry reading and musical improv event at the Poetry Cafe (it’s hard to stay gone for too long…). It was a truly weird and wonderful night filled with beautiful people, even more beautiful words, and of course some ever-experimental music. It was a night unlike any other. I hope to have a thousand more like it.

If you managed to reach the end of this post then thank you for sticking with it, and with me through all of this strangeness and magic and bittersweet joy.

Until next time,

Lucy x

(p.s. since my last post I have changed both my instagram handle and my hair, so go follow me @lucyhannahryan to see proof of both)